Ashes to ashes and dust to dust…
The entire Solar System was once nothing more than a cloud of dust out of which came the planets and the Sun. We are part of it and yet the only burial ground we’ve had access to was the one under our feet.
This is about to change.
You are one of the most successful people on the planet. In the past, people who came ahead of entire nations were celebrated after they passed on in spectacular ways. Your success is beyond borders, spanning the globe.
Ancient Egyptians built mega tombs for their pharaohs – the pyramids laid out to match the stars. We will take you there.
This is the ultimate passage. You will leave the shackles of this Earth and travel 100 million miles to your final resting place – no other than the Sun itself.
Your body will be carefully preserved for the 18 month trip and placed in a custom built casket made of space age materials. Remote control cameras on-board your vehicle will allow your remaining loved ones to see you and witness your journey throughout its duration.
The Vikings often celebrated the passing of their kings by building a ship, and setting it out to sea. They then would alight it and the body would be consumed by the all cleansing fire. Nothing would remain to be infested by maggots. Honour was preserved even after death.
The Sun’s fire gives us life. Without it, Earth would be just a frozen piece of rock. You will therefore be the first if not the only human to return to the source of life.
Prior to the trip, your loved ones and friends will be able to pay you tribute in a private ceremony. You can trust our highly experienced embalming team to protect your body and give it a noble look. At the end of the home ceremony, the caravan will travel to the launch location where the casket will be placed in the custom built capsule with great caution and due respect. Whilst the rocket is readied for launch, your guests will have a choice of accommodation in the area or they can return on the launch date.
Although a private celebration, your departure will be witnessed by millions if not billions people all around the globe. To go out with a bang will suddenly have a new meaning.
The launch will be only the beginning of an 18 month long voyage to your final resting place. The Sun. The Great Cleansing Fire. The most honourable passage for the most accomplished human ever lived.
There is no need for you to do anything right now. You will be invited in due time to a private, professional consultation to take your personal requests and present you with the detailed scope of the service. The preparation will start upon the receipt of a 20% advance to arrange for initial vehicle development, build and testing and will take three to five years. This is a significant improvement compared to a lifetime required for tomb building for the average pharaoh. Once the work is under way, milestone payments will complete the order and the entire system will be ready for you when the time comes. The total cost is one billion US dollars – a sum that will show the world that you indeed had money to burn. No-one will be able to beat that in many years to come.
Sun Burial service – the ultimate final voyage.
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Photo credit top to bottom:
The Sun emits an M5.9 Solar Flare
Shetland’s Up Helly Aa Fire Festival
Other World Rocket Launch
Press and other non customer enquiries:
sunburial@gmail.com